A not positive or helpful stream of conscious post

 

This blog post is not going to be very useful or helpful or enlightening or positive or even coherent.  In fact, it will probably mostly definitely be just flat out whiny, poorly constructed sentences.  I don’t care, I am tired, I am hot and my hips and back hurt really bad.  I am supposed to be doing all these inspiring and great things, but instead I wait until someone needs something from me and this morning I chose ramen noodles for breakfast.  I feel drained of style and spark that is so determinedly me.  Nothing fits in my closet.  That is my own fault (see above for breakfast choice). This summer has been too hot, and I have been too needed to even remember when I bathed last.   I don’t feel like making myself look pretty.

I have always been the type of person who put others way before myself, I am good at it.  I have kids and I am a stay at home gal while my man works his ass off to provide a very lovely lifestyle, it is my job.  Don’t misunderstand, I love being the lady who runs the house.  I don’t mind at all.  I love it in fact.  Have I mentioned that I am very good at my job?…mostly …except when I go on a cleaning and cooking strike.  It is just that I’ve noticed it is mostly those who put 100% into their job who need a vacation the most or they burn out.  This summer I hit burn out.  Maybe too much mind numbing heat and not enough (any) real time for JUST me and I = zombie.  I need a break quite honestly.  I need a break so I can work my ass off in peace.   I want to work hard on something and not pay a consequence on it… Like when I over did it in the garden the other day because I knew I only had so much time to get it done.  My poor out of shape body still hurts.  I don’t want a vacation.  I wan’t time to do more,  I want motivation to do more,  I want my body to cooperate and not hurt when I do more.  Mostly, I want the heat to go away and for it to rain.

 

Thank you for listening to my whiny rant.  At least I had the time to get this done before superJude woke.  it is very important that we have schnuggle and cartoon watching time in the morning.

 

dedicatedly yours,

Wenders